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And that depression may have started well before the marriage. ;) It can all seem like a big jumble, for a long time, and take a long time to sort itself out. I disagree with those who say "just find someone else", and I'd caution against jumping into the dating scene, too. Especially if you have young children.Quote:
Originally Posted by Dreadnaught
On my behalf, that was just a suggestion - we are all grown-ups, and fully aware that emotions and feelings are an area where "one size fits all" solutions don't exist. It's just what I'd try. My perspective is the best I can offer, and I realize my approach might be absolutely unusable for others.
No worries Baltic ;) I was wondering if the name you were looking for is the Peter Principle? That's based on the business world elevating people beyond their ability, and keeping them there, throwing good money after bad, to save face. I suppose the same could apply to personal relationships....and it can be really hard to know when to keep going, or cut loose.
Marriage requires two people.....but divorce only needs one. That seems like a crazy thing, so why bother getting married in the first place? Well, I was among that naive and hopeful group that believed love was the beginning, and marriage was its symbolic contract. I refused to get a pre-nup -- that would be like admitting the marriage would eventually end -- but I really did believe we'd spend our lives together, and fight to keep our marriage alive until the day we died. Wow, was I wrong.
I'd like to say Divorce has made me stronger, or that my kids have fared better, but I can't, because it wouldn't be true. If anything, divorce has made me, and my kids, emotional skeptics. That makes it even more heart wrenching to watch them try to establish meaningful relationships on their own, and fail.