Topics being discussed here while reppin' the UAE:
-green energy
-amelioration of our long-standing relationship with the west
-opening opec "ranks" to other oil-producing nations
The world is being swept up in a Green craze. In order to satisfy the masses, many industrialized nations have debased their own capitalist ambitions to promote a “progressive” green agenda. Florescent bulbs, low-flush toilets, electrical energy conservation, and recycling--- all examples of the so called-called “progressive powers” whoring themselves to the mush-minded public, pandering to their lowest wishes, and gratifying their Eco-fad addiction and for what purpose? Reelection? The anti-capitalist sentiments of many of these green proponents retard the development of our global economy, as they invest the world’s resources in convenient, feel-good pipe dreams. Amidst the contusioned herd, the United Arab Emirates stands resolute to maintain its dignity as well as the dignity of its fraternal bond with the oil-producing nations of OPEC. Many OPEC nations have begun siding with the Western world and have betrayed the principle pillars of our fraternity. Our organization was founded on a bedrock of resentment for the Western world and the imperialist tentacles of its mercantilist goals. The UAE understands that if we continue to sail down this tumultuous river, the OPEC nations will be reduced to a menagerie of oddities to be laughed at by the Western world.
The promotion of Green Energy is a recent extension of the Western world’s obsession with the concept of global warming. World leaders want to point their fingers at petroleum, oil, and natural gas as the cause of all of their environmental problems. However, the developed world's obsession with blaming themselves, and ourselves, for the state of the environment is merely a reflection of Western man's masochistic tendencies. In conjunction with Judeo-Christian thought and Dark Age principles, the Western world has had a longstanding relationship with self-hate and debasement. Not having the capacity to withstand the backlash of all of their pain-mongering desires, the Western world delegates their punishment onto petroleum-producing countries, namely us. The OPEC nations need to remove themselves from the machinations of this sadomasochistic relationship. We merely cater to their petroleum-addicted desires in order to finance our own sovereignty, a tradition that cannot be diluted by the illusion of environmental friendliness.
Clearly, the Green Movement must be retarded at all costs; however, we cannot blatantly or overtly advocate for our anti-environmental agenda. We must slow down the proliferation of Green Energy through active advocation of inefficient and downright wasteful “green energies”. These would include: geothermal, wind, solar, and oceanic wave turbines energy. In the face of these ridiculous sideshow freaks of the energy world, all useful, efficient, and practical green energies will be hopelessly lost. Interestingly enough, most green proponents have now come to the self-realization that their “efficient” non-petroleum based energies are detrimental to the environment. For example, hydroelectric dams expunge entire ecosystems, causing thousands of different species of flora and fauna to either migrate or face extinction. In addition, nuclear energy might not pollute the atmosphere, but it does pollute the water supply and arable land.
OPEC should actively support the development of solar technology because "green energy" proponents are activists who haven't been able to figure out how incredibly inefficient and infeasible it is to provide large amounts of power using solar energy. By supporting the development of solar power we ensure that development of viable and practical future energy production is stunted in favor of political pandering to conservationists, ensuring reliance on burning oil for energy for the foreseeable future. Furthermore, current "cutting edge" solar technology relies heavily on synthetic plastics and rubbers made from petroleum. Through solar power environmentalists are unwittingly supporting the use of "evil" oil in their quest for "green" energy.
Every decade or so we plan to have an individual with a Ph.D. remind the world that current proven oil reserves will only last another fifty years at most, in order to keep the public anxious about the supply of oil. Under no circumstances should our rent-a-doc mention that unproven reserves and oil fields owned (but not yet tapped) by major petrol-corporations contain enough oil to make the current proven reserves look like a drop in the ocean. It’s been working since the early 1900's, so it should continue to be an effective strategy for another hundred years or more.
Some may argue that we should turn to alternative energy because we want the human race to flourish. However, we must oppose this on account that we cannot afford to act like the US; we all have our welfare states to run back home. And if we were to sell out to alternative energies, we certainly would not be pioneers of that. Oil is exclusive to us, but alternative energy will not will not be so exclusive. If we play copy-cat with the West we’ll risk returning to the 40’s in the era before oil, one marked by chaos and Israeli dominance. A possible positive plan might include developing a mandatory or non-mandatory monetary reserve from oil revenues, buying us some time.
In conclusion, all forms of non-petroleum based fuels must be stopped. We must force the world to accept that no current form of energy can truly replace and/or be as efficient as petroleum. Once countries realize that, they will eagerly substitute their renewable resources for good ole' fashioned Emirati crude. Fortunately, thanks to the current economic condition, countries will attempt to allocate their resources as efficiently as possible, thus the OPEC nations should be able to force this opinion on the Western world with as little subterfuge as possible. Should the OPEC nations weaken in their resolve, The United Arab Emirates have a suggestion for a new name: OGS, Organization of Green Sellouts.
Concerning the amelioration of OPEC's often tumultuous relationship with the West; our short answer is: not possible. To elaborate on our position, the constant political and economic struggle for survival between ourselves and the West arouses a need for further conflict. As previously ejaculated, the history between our regions has been marked by abuse. Years of submission to Western will has disrobed the pride of our honorable nations, molested our lands, and impregnated our hearts with contemptuous resentment. In Africa, our oil-producing friends stood begrudgingly erect as the so-called white man's burden burdened them with the fallacy of imperialism. Under the mandate system, our Middle Eastern brethren were strapped down and lashed with the double-pronged whip of economic and political slavery. On the other side of the Atlantic, our South American comrades were forced to endure the abominable bondage of the Monroe Doctrine and Roosevelt Corollary, their moans for freedom gagged. Following the rising and falling motions of struggle and release between the OPEC nations and the West, the climax of our disharmonious intercourse must and will fall in our favor.
OPEC is discontent with the previous and current American presidential administration's foreign policies; the recent violation of national sovereignty in Iraq, Kuwait, and Afghanistan has augmented our mortification. During the First Gulf War America invaded the benevolent nation of Iraq and its humble leader Saddam Hussein in order to further their stranglehold over fellow OPEC nation Kuwait. Following the so-called 9/11 “terrorist attacks,” the West extended their megalomaniac machinations into the noble, albeit OPEC outsider nation of, Afghanistan. Shortly thereafter, President George “Great Satan” W. Bush delivered his coup-de-grace to Iraq and officially earned himself a space on our nation's wall of belligerent Western mercantilists. Clearly, the Obama administration is no better, as they have yet to interrupt their military intercourse with our Middle Eastern Brethren and pull out. The West has proven to be a constant fount of aggression towards our economic interests and regional allies, one that is unforgivable and reconciliation.
American support of the Semitic powers of the “state” of Israel during the Yom Kippur War led to the declaration of our collective will against Western interests through our 1973 Oil Embargo whose ramifications still linger to this day in America. Through the assertion of our collective interest, OPEC placed the Western world under the all too familiar stranglehold of economic imprisonment. Like a powerless toddler whose rattle has been momentarily confiscated, the Western world was forced to whimper for mercy as we dangled our immense petroleum resources inches above their noses. The dramatic effects of our oil embargo seeped into the farthest reaches of the Western world because the West is an oil-dependent machine. To extend our analogy, the West is comparable to a beautiful gas-guzzling hummer. While seemingly dominating all terrains, this powerful machine is nothing more than an inconvenient piece of modern art and/or paperweight without its petroleum fuel. The OPEC nations should have no fear of the off-road tires of the Western warhorse; the Western nations may have the keys, but we are the ignition. Should the West decide not to cater to any one of our demands, we could easily throw them into a state of chaos through oil embargoes for extended temporal junctions. In layman's terms, the West is our hostage; we control the lifeblood that supports the infrastructure of their entire existence. Lastly, a history of ethno-religious, socioeconomic, and political abuse has rendered our differences irreconcilable, but we have no reason to seek reconciliation. The OPEC nations have all the leverage we could possibly require and that is why there is no need for bipartisan understanding.
Being a self serving, in-group biased, oligopoly, OPEC nations must have no intention of augmenting our roster. Power is not always found in numbers, especially in this instance. Many proponents of opening up membership to other oil producing nations believe that a more encompassing monopoly of the world's oil supply would be beneficial; however, this opinion clearly does not account for dissenting interests. Each new nation admitted into OPEC will add its own list of needs and wants that must be satiated before synergy can be achieved. OPEC would have to compensate and mitigate for the entry of each new nation, which would require resources that we would not be able to use to further our agenda. Furthermore, OPEC does not necessarily need a larger monopoly in order to control the price of petroleum. OPEC does not exist in order to control the world's oil supply; it exists to satisfy the economic demands of its members, a task that has been accomplished through the collaboration and solidarity of its twelve members since its creation. It is not even necessary for us to have a simple majority of the world's oil supply; the dearth of teamwork exhibited by non-OPEC oil-producing nations renders our limited control of the market still far superior to any competitor’s. Nevertheless, we do control roughly 51% of the world's oil reserves and 33% of its refineries. OPEC is like the “cool kids’ table” because everyone wished to join our exclusive club; however, a certain amount of our power and desirability is derived from our exclusivity. If we were to allow every Joe America, Sergei Russia or Ting-Ling Indonesia to join our ranks we would not be OPEC, we would be OHNO!
this was my final draft, good? bad? meh? stupid?
