There is no membership of the single market. Full stop. The EU has members as does EFTA. The EU members have full access to the single market. All others have limited access to the single market either on the basis of the agreement that established the EEA or in the case of Switzerland the so-called bilaterals. Once you are no longer a member of the EU you drop out of the entire structure.
Your ability to negotiate any deals will be severely limited by the fact that countries won't or cannot negotiate with you for as long as at least your WTO standing has been sorted out. Your WTO standing won't be sorted out until you have disentangled yourself from the EU and EEA.
When Obama said you were at the back of the queue he wasn't giving an opinion, he was laying out the legal situation that would be brought about by Brexit.

You bleary-eyed Brexiteers make auto-dafe look like a reasoned act.