What's messing with your Groove?

[GGT]

The other thing messing with my groove relates to the whereabouts of my youngest son. I had called the ex several hours ago, yesterday in fact, asking if Andrew was with him, since he was supposed to call me after he returned to town from a day at Hershey Park. No answer until this morning, a few minutes ago. But the boy did call me before midnight, saying he's at a friend's house.

Somehow, when the ex finally called this morning, he said he was PISSED, because the boy needed to be picked up today after the over night. I asked why he was PISSED if he was too busy to answer his phone last night, but he was supposed to be the parent in charge. No real answer.

OMG I can't believe this is the man I married and chose to have children with. It's the most bizarre thing when yesterdays don't match todays, but there are innocent children involved.



AND ANOTHER THING, dammit. He used the term "shoulder time". We have been doing this shared custody crap for almost ten fucking years, and he's never used that term. Not even our family counselors used that term. I'm pretty sure his fiance fed him that word. She doesn't share custody with her first husband for their children, oh no, HER children are grown women, one even has her OWN child. But that's the kind of thing match.com lets slide. He didn't find out she was a grandma until she had to leave last Christmas because the toddler was in the hospital. shh it was a big secret, my kids were with them and still had no idea.

No, she shares "custody" of her marital DOGS. They go back and forth every other weekend. Little yappy lap dogs, one of them nipped my little boy. So when they want to get away for the weekend even if it's her DOG visitation weekend, they've been putting the poor pups at his house. In my (our) kids' bedrooms, and they crapped all over the place. In their rooms. Then he expects them to come help him clean up his house, and her dog's messes.

I RESENT

THIS MAN I USED TO LOVE, THE FATHER OF OUR CHILDREN.

and I hate myself for having chosen this fucking idiot. Until I realize these kids are half of him, and they feel connected to both of us, and they shouldn't hate any part of themselves.

This is much more difficult in practice than anything I could ever imagine. I am glad to have a forum like this, a safe place I can yell and vent, to people who've known me over the years. I often sound crazy, but you don't throw me to the curb on my ass.

Thanks for that.