The Ashes 2010

[termite]

Simon Katich's best efforts are well behind him.
Shane Watson is doing well as an opener, so long as he can remain uninjured for a while we may be able to get a return for all the faith he has been shown.
Michael Clarke is B grade cricketer more concerned with his appearance than his performance, he has been the single biggest distraction and cause of dysfunction in the team and even as he fails to perform he gets selected - why?
Ponting is a bitter shadow of the player he was 5 years ago and his captaincy has been predictable and boring - something we used to accuse England captains of.
Hussey has been on the verge of being dumped for the last 12 months and has once again saved his skin with some stoic batting but his fielding which was such a key facet of his selection has been woeful by his standards.
Marcus North has never performed to his potential and has had too many second chances, he should not be playing in this series.
Haddin is solid contributor that is asked to do much when the top order fails.
The tail is our worst in 20 years - what is it with bowlers that are professional cricketers and do not know how to bat? For Fuck Sake get in the nets and practice your batting.

As I said earlier, our bowling attack is pedestrian, there is no bowler threatening to break through - Siddle had 5 minutes of fever pitch bowling in the first test and has rested on that ever since. Test cricket requires repeat efforts not 5 minute bursts of passion followed by hours of mediocre medium pace shite.

Hauritz must have fucked one of the selectors daughters or something because he should be in the team.

[RandBlade]

Keep falling asleep on the couch watching this, ~3-4am. Woke up today and turned it back on, was disappointed to only have 3 wickets if I'm honest, but surprised to see Pieterson bowling. Next and last delivery, Clarke out . Strange one too, walked then stopped walking and the umpire never seemed to decide either way but Eng reviewed and clearly out.

6 wickets tomorrow, but bad weather forecast. Hope rain doesn't spoil it. I won't feel confident until Hussey or Haddin are out.

[RandBlade]

Hussey and Haddin both out within the first hour! Just hope the weather holds, into the tail already we've got North and the bowlers to face now.

[RandBlade]

HOWZATTTTT!!!!!

King Pair for Harris! Come on!

Reviewed but still out! Harris only the second Aussie ever to get a King Pair?

[RandBlade]

North LBW appeal worked! 8 out, 3 wickets in 4 balls. North 'walked' from the review screen before the review decision was even made.

[RandBlade]

Innings and 71 run victory , first Innings defeat Australia's suffered at home since '93 - which is basically when I started to watch and learn to play the sport.

We've got to be favourites now surely to at least retain the urn. Don't want to jynx us, especially with Broad ruled out of the rest of the series (along with Australia's Katich I believe), but would hope on this form we wouldn't lose 20 wickets in 2 of the remaining 3 matches.

Next match at Perth means 2am starts UK time, not sure I'll be able to watch much of that one

[termite]

Seriously Randy, the Poms have been raging favourites from the start. This is by far the worst Australian team since the mid 80's and it is clearly the best England team in living memory.

England WILL win this series.

[RandBlade]

Gah, you call yourself an Aussie? How can you be so totally agreeable, where's the fun in that?

[termite]

I'm a realist...

[Lor]

I'm still shocked that we won, purely because of what happened last time.

[termite]

Aussie selectors have show some balls, dropped Marcus North, Doug the Rug and rookie spinner Xavier Doherty - they've brought in some untried young players - what the hell, might as well give them a crack now rather than waiting for the dead rubbers.

In: Michael Beer, Phil Hughes and Steven Smith.

If all else fails, try Beer...

[RandBlade]

What a start, England elect to bowl and get a wicket in the first over. Reviewed and overturned though ... To be followed by a wicket in the second. An opener bowled out there's no reviewing that.

EDIT: Ponting is no Steve Waugh. Edged through the gap, edged above Strauss's head but he just gets a fingertip to it. Edged to gap but Collingwood holds it, out! Again now 2 out after just 5 overs.

[Lor]

Another poor 1st innings from the aussies, what on earth is going on!

[termite]

It would appear that my home ground (WACA) has once again made life too difficult for the Poms, evidently Kevin Pieterson made a complete twat of himself by sledging the Aussie bowlers and then getting a duck and a 3 in his two innings. The Ashes Series is now level and the boxing day test remains crucial, that gives me something to listen to on the radio while fishing and drinking on Boxing Day.

[RandBlade]

Not good, completely threw that Test away after getting the Aussie openers out so cheaply.

Looking forward to the MCG Test, the one I most identify with having grown up in Victoria. Not sure I'll get to see the first day though since Boxing Day Aussie time is the night of Christmas Day ours.

[RandBlade]

Wow. Didn't watch the first day of the Boxing Day test due to it still being Christmas here and Amanda's been understanding about me sleeping on the couch in order to watch the cricket but not on Christmas night. Watched about 5 min, long enough to see Ponting go. Will havevto watch the highlights though!

Aus 98 all out, Eng 157 without loss. Don't want to jynx it, but Strauss couldn't have asked for a better present off Ponting

[RandBlade]

WTF is up with Ponting's behaviour? The umpires decision used to be final, now he's had the umpires decision and a third umpire review, for a captain to harangue an umpire like that is an awful example.

444-5 and a lead of 346 after just 2 days, we have to be in such a strong position now. Friends in Melbourne say the forecast is for sunshine so surely by the end of this Test now the Ashes will be retained? Given his form all series is it possible that Ponting could get dropped altogether and not just fired as captain for the last Test?

[RandBlade]

England win by an Innings and 157 runs and retain the Ashes

[RandBlade]

With a draw or win needed to win the series, a loss sees us retain it outright, England are batting Australia out of this. 608-8 currently and they're knocking it around the park.

Fascinating record: The first time ever in any Test by any team ever that partnerships six, seven and eight were all about a hundred. Probably not too much longer left in this Innings but keeping the run rate up to not waste time after the loss time to Sydney's rain. 328 run lead and counting.

EDIT: Of course since I spoke, Prior's out. 609-9 with batsmen 10&11 in can't be much more now.

EDIT2: ROFL @ Watson's Run Out, check the highlights to see that it's absolutely comical. Not exactly a need for a Third Man in that one

[Adamant]

Australia lack any sort of batting consistency, positions 3 and 4, namely Ponting and Clarke, are obviously mired in form slumps, the openers chop and change like the weather, about the only saving grace is the timeless Hussey and a tail which occasionally wags with the likes of Johnson.
Couple that with the glaring omission of strike bowlers (Siddle sets the example but as yet remains wet behind the ears) and reliable spinner/swing artists for variety, and you have a depressing period in Aus international cricket.

Clarke is only selected by rote, as such should be dropped to learn humility and how to bat again, I feel for Ponting but his approach was often sentimental and bitter.
England has managed to polish it's far younger weapons and pursue victory tirelessly, entrusting watchful openers and a determined middle order that succeeded in frustrating any Australian attack. The result was lapses in judgment, dropped catches and the like, but truly the series was won by English batsmen surviving, flourishing and in some cases demonstrating the evident lack of fight in the Australian roster.

Twas a little depressing to watch Aus collapse as an avid supporter, yet this was the inevitable plunge in the wake of recent years of gradual decline, selectors need to reach back through the divisions and develop yet more replacements for Ponting and Hussey.
Well done England though, well and truly dominated.

(It's Widows btw, in case you were wondering.)

[Timbuk2]

Oooh hello Widows, and welcome.

[termite]

Strauss retired

[RandBlade]

Hi Widows!

Strauss retired

Seriously? Collingwood retired from Test cricket, though he'll still play ODI's and be the T20 captain, not seen anything about Strauss doing so - that would be far more of a shock.

While I was a bit confident in the OP about potentially winning, I'd have put it no more than 50-50 if I was honest. What is quite remarkable is that in '05 and '09 there were some really tight finishes, in most cricket series there are. I can't recall any series before where every match is so extreme. The opener was such a nailed-on draw by the end but with some dramatic days, this could be potentially our third victory by and Innings and Australia's victory at Perth was so one-sided too. There's not been any close finishes, someone winning by 2 wickets or 20 runs.

[Lor]

Strauss hasn't retired, only Colly!

[RandBlade]

Wrapped up the series 3-1, with another victory by an innings.

[termite]

Yeah a colleague of mine said it was Strauss - I should have checked!

[Adamant]

One thing I found near-sacrilegious during the home soil telecast was the chief sponsor, KFC defaming even the Ashes replica and traditional ceremony with American cliches during their advertisements, what's the price of dignity?

[Lor]

What a win, an impressive display over 5 tests - well done to all involved. On another note I was listening to the BBC Radio 5SX for the last part - bloody hilarious stuff from Vaughan and Co:

What do you call a world-class Australian cricketer? Retired

What do you call an Aussie with a bottle of Champagne? A waiter.

What do you call an Australian who can hold a catch? A fisherman.

Why can no-one drink wine in Australia at the moment? They haven't got any openers.

What is the difference between Cinderella and the Aussies? Cinderella knew when to leave the ball.

What's the Australian version of LBW? Lost, Beaten and Walloped.

What do you call an Aussie holding a six inch urn above his head? The England bowling coach!

Not all is lost. Australia still has world class spinners. There's the redback, the funnel web.

[termite]

Come now Lor there is really no need to take old England jokes and replace "English" with Aussie - its just not cricket!

I like the first one though because it is entirely true.

I am enjoying this turning of the tables, it will hopefully help re-invigorate Test cricket which has seen support declining steadily around the world.

My only gripe from the Test series other than Australia's performances were the comments made by Ian "Beefy" Botham about our young opener Phil Hughes. It is interesting to note that Beefy called Phil Hughes a cheat the other day for catching a ball that bounced, holding it in front of himself and asking "did it carry?". He didn't appeal, he simply didn't know for sure if it bounced or not, on super slow-motion it clearly bounced and it looks like he MUST have known it bounced but watch it at normal speed and it is a very different reality.

Good on you Botham for completely misrepresenting the actions of a young cricketer trying to build a career for himself - the most disappointing aspect for the young player is that he knows Botham is a well respected and highly decorated cricketer/commentator and his opinion carries weight (much like Beefy himself!). It would be nice if Beefy would simply acknowledge that he went too far - though I doubt he would go so far as to apologise.

Curious though that Beefy did NOT make any comments about any of the Pakistan players currently being dealt with for ACTUAL cheating - It is not a good idea to criticise anything that happens on the sub-continent in modern day cricket as it is likely to see you marginalised by the Indian power brokers and severely limit your future prospects.

What a shame we will now have to endure the IPL with its pathetic over-the-top commercialised cricket and piss-poor attempts at razzamatazz.

[Adamant]

I enjoy cricket rivalries, having played quite a few comps it brings new energy to the contest when the players are as passionate as in evidence at this Ashes, the Summer of cricket continues now with 20/20 and One-Dayers.