Slow access for a week...
The girlfriend is staying at my place for a week while job-hunting. This will probably restrict my access here to when I get go to the toilet at work and check the forums on my smartphone.
I apologize in advance for slow responses, short responses and responses with hilarious typos.
Just another stupid English question: Wouldn't it be more appropriate to write "My girlfriend" instead of "The girlfriend" ?
"Wer Visionen hat, sollte zum Arzt gehen." - Helmut Schmidt
commitment issues
I'm insulted, or a little grossed out, that Dread considers us some sort of dirty little secret...
He also considers his own toileting a dirty little secret, though, OG.
He'll get over these issues one day.
We're stuck in a bloody snowglobe.
Says those who probably don't live in studio apartments with toilets six feet from the bed.
But we've resolved the toileting issues. But no commitment issues, I'm just not...possessive?
Yes, you all are dirty little secrets.
So when you say "go to the toilet at work", surely you don't actually mean that you're using your phone while you're sitting on the throne, do you?
If so, that's just wrong.
Such is Life...
Dude, just BE LOUD and BE PROUD.Originally Posted by Dreadnaught
Says those who probably don't live in studio apartments with toilets six feet from the bed.
I get that from time to time in the loos at my work, the sound of tappity tapping from the cubicle next to me as someone is fiddling with a phone.So when you say "go to the toilet at work", surely you don't actually mean that you're using your phone while you're sitting on the throne, do you?
If so, that's just wrong.
Such are the joys of working in a geeky IT dept.
Hey, I just think there's a reason they pipe fast wifi into the bathrooms.So when you say "go to the toilet at work", surely you don't actually mean that you're using your phone while you're sitting on the throne, do you?
If so, that's just wrong.
There's also a reason they pipe shit out of bathrooms.Hey, I just think there's a reason they pipe fast wifi into the bathrooms.
Such is Life...
3 feet, hereSays those who probably don't live in studio apartments with toilets six feet from the bed.
Sometimes in a bar I check my phone while sitting on the toilet. Otherwise it's wasted time anyway, and it's not so polite to be tapping on your phone while sitting next to someone in a bar!
Keep on keepin' the beat alive!
So far so good, though her meeting some of my family didn't go so great. Which honestly has never happened for me.
I think it has something to do with her career goals having a less obvious path to riches, and my family becoming strangely resume-focused of late. Which is sorta ridiculous, almost everyone I meet my age who isn't in financial services or law is either underemployed, in school or heavily subsidized by their parents.
Awww. Need an obvious path to riches? Insert Jew-remark here.
Seriously though people have different plans and trying to stick to a plan is not always possible, anyone actually trying though (in whatever form that takes) gets my respect. I can't stand people who just can't be bothered and want to stick others (the state, their parents, their friends) with the bill.
Might have to do with your advancing ageSo far so good, though her meeting some of my family didn't go so great. Which honestly has never happened for me.
I think it has something to do with her career goals having a less obvious path to riches, and my family becoming strangely resume-focused of late. Which is sorta ridiculous, almost everyone I meet my age who isn't in financial services or law is either underemployed, in school or heavily subsidized by their parents.Some start looking at marriage material mid-twenties....
You mean, 'insert New Yorker remark here'. Anyone not in finance or law is underemployed?! Only in New York would anyone say that. Ditto for the crazy family. There's a difference between instilling an ethic of ensuring self-sufficiency and hard work (very Jewy) and scrutinizing potential mates for earnings potential (very crazy).Awww
Maybe he meant to say "undercompensated" instead of underemployed, at least by Manhattan standards? Can't wait to hear what HER family says about Dread.....
Yeah, undercompensated is probably a better word. But I'm being serious, my only friends in the region who are making a solid living without parental support are in finance, law and maybe one or two other industries.
I'm having her come over to my mom's for dinner tomorrow night before she goes so they can actually meet and my mom can actually talk to her. Though my sister said something very mean to the effect that this girl isn't as attractive as most girls I've dated over the past five years. Which is perhaps true, the thought is now psyching me out. Except none of those girls has made me laugh as much -- and engaged me mentally as much -- as those girls.
Welcome to the Great Recession, where even college grads are effected.
Don't let your sister psych you out---she's not the one in the relationship. Besides, brains trumps beauty, and finding someone to laugh with is priceless.
Affected.
Seriously, though, don't listen to your family. If you like the girl, go for it. And obviously you're attracted enough to her, which is all that really matters.
Wise words, indeed.
Such is Life...
Had her meet my mom for take-out dinner last night, it was very well.
And she came to work today before flying out, where my co-worker (unprompted) said she was really attractive. Which supports my emerging theory that she has interesting looks are attractive to many, but perhaps not everyone.
Gotta say, having someone stay with you for a week on end at the beginning of a relationship is certainly interesting. I loved having her here, but it's nice to just have my apartment and alone time. And I can be as noisy as I want when I take dumps.
But it's interesting to me so I gotta ask.....first, why are those around you so eager to comment on your girl friend's looks, and secondly why would you care what they think anyway? If you found her attractive then isn't that what matters?
1. guys comment on any girl's looks all the time
But it's interesting to me so I gotta ask.....first, why are those around you so eager to comment on your girl friend's looks, and secondly why would you care what they think anyway? If you found her attractive then isn't that what matters?
2. That is what matters, b ut it's still nice to hear
Keep on keepin' the beat alive!
It's more that I don't have a great stomach sometimes, so I was worried. But ultimately she is really casual about that stuff.
It's hard not to care when people are commenting though. Don't we all look for other people's feedback on these kinds of things, subtle and overt?
And now I am going to visit the girlfriend this weekend, so alas I shall be not-here.
Sometimes, but it's not a talent competition for the masses. If she ultimately makes you happy and you're attracted to her then you go for it regardless of what people think. If she makes you smile/feel like a little boy inside/laugh then that trumps any little iffy element you or someone else doesn't quite like.
As for the toilet situation, just man up and take a dump. Evidence shows she digs you anyway so i doubt she'd be put off.
Sadly just broke up with her. It was really tough; she said she thought we could possibly have fallen in love someday.
Ultimately some of her unattractiveness had to do with her unwillingness to take care of herself. But it just began to bug me —part of the feeling you get in your stomach is when other people do see some skin-deep beauty in your partner. I don't want to bang super-hot people. I've found that sorta-out-of-my-league super hot people tend to be somewhat boring folks.
But there was also just a maturity gap. I'm sadly finding out that, while nominally I don't care about what someone does for a living, it can sometimes be hard to relate when someone is an unemployed student. Which bugs the shit out of me to admit (just as much as the looks thing).
On the plus side, taking a crap in the same apartment as her ceased to be a problem.
Last edited by Dreadnaught; 10-13-2010 at 11:27 AM.
Does sound like you didn't have an awful lot in common really.
True. Though she did make me laugh more than most girls I've dated in the past three years. But the whole long distance thing made it hard to evaluate whether I was actually attracted to her — talking on the phone and on video chat over the course of three months didn't erase the fact that we had only spend 12-14 days in the same city in the same time period. And it's tough to feel like you really know someone in person and you're attracted to them with that kind of spread-out interaction in person.
Hmm.. didn't really surprise me.
Congratulations America
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